The Dance

Oct 6, 1996. Twenty one years. It seems like a lifetime ago but also just like yesterday. Twenty one years ago I said "I do" and married my best friend and the love of my life. Greg and I got 16 wonderful years together, full of love, laughter, kids, a few fights, and did I mention lots and lots of love?

Wedding anniversaries are times of reflection and memories. So today, even though I'm doing this anniversary alone, just like I have for the past 5 years, I'm remembering. It brings me happiness to remember the love and life we shared, but it also brings me tears because it's over.

Many years ago a song became popular, sung by Garth Brooks, called "The Dance". It's a beautiful, sad song about love that's been lost.

Looking back on the memory of

The dance we shared beneath the stars above

For a moment all the world was right

How could I have known you'd ever say goodbye

And now I'm glad I didn't know

The way it all would end the way it all would go

Our lives are better left to chance I could have missed the pain

But I'd have to miss the dance

It's a song that can be very hard to listen to, a trigger. But I've learned from a fellow widowed friend, Matthew, that sometimes it's ok to lean into that grief, to listen to those trigger songs, even if it makes you cry. It makes you stronger each time you manage to get through it. So I listen, I cry, and my heart swells with agreement, "I could have missed the pain, but I'd have to miss the dance." And the dance was SO WORTH IT! Happy Anniversary, Sweetheart.